Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can't Lose.

In 2015 Hunter and I binge watched the show Friday Night Lights faster than we had ever watched a show before. Actually, it's probably the only series Hunter has ever actually finished. We were obsessed. If you haven't seen the show, it's on Hulu and is a must! It's about a high school football team in Texas with an incredible coach. It follows the life of the players and the coach and whether or not you like football, I promise you'll like this show. And if you don't... then I have no words! Ha! In the show, the team chants "Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can't lose" before every game. Hunter and I became obsessed with this saying, along with half of America. We ended up adding it to our family motto because the saying holds so much meaning that we want our girls to embrace. Here's what the saying means to me...

Clear Eyes: Living life with a clear focus. I know that life gets hard. I know that things will always get thrown our way that may distract and deter us from becoming who we were meant to be. However, I think that living your life with clear eyes means having the ability to see clearly during the hard times rather than letting the end goal become blurry.

Full Hearts: I think that going through life with a full heart means living each day with gratitude. It means not taking what you have for granted and appreciating even the smallest things. When you have a heart full of gratitude, you're sure to see the good in each situation. I also think it means keeping your heart full of love, passion, confidence, honesty, humility, and dedication. It means working on yourself to become your best self and the best way to do that is to keep your heart full and your path (eyes) clear. 

Can't Lose: At the end of the day, if you've given it all you've got, you cannot lose. This slogan means so much more than simply winning the game, but also imparts the importance of being the best version of yourself. Because if you win with a hard heart and blurry vision, did you really win at all? By approaching life with honesty, heart, and accountability, the "loss" is not really a loss. Instead, this saying imparts the value of doing one's best and accepting that it doesn't always mean "winning" in the world's eyes. The important element here, is that it does not mean the non-winner is a loser, but rather that by upholding values of perseverance, humility, and dedication, the individual is a winner regardless of what the "scoreboard" says.

As the girls get older and life gets tougher, I hope they always remember to keep their eyes clear, their hearts full, and remember that winning isn't all about a number or a "prize" but rather what's on the inside. 

All my love,

Aleigh Joy

3

A Little Life Update

Thank you Pink Blush for sponsoring this post

Hi friends!

It's been a hot minute since I've sat down and typed out some sort of update.

Life has been exceptionally busy lately!

Even though I like when I'm busy, it can also be overwhelming and the first thing that gets pushed to the back burner is blogging... sad!

However, I've had quite a few of you message me asking what's happening in our life currently so I figured I'd at least pop in here for a second and give a little update!

Hunter:

Hunter was working for Marriott right when we moved here.

He was trying his best to enjoy it, but just knew it wasn't the right path.

He ended up applying for another company here in San Diego and got the job!

It's called General Atomics and they build unmanned aircraft for the military.

To be honest, we had no idea what to expect with him applying.

We knew he could totally do it, but they've never hired anyone right out of college for this position.

We were so happy that he got it and we have been loving the schedule!

The hotel business has awful hours and is pretty taxing on a family.

This has been a million times better for us.

Hunter is still learning the ropes but likes this job way better!

Aleigh:

Moving was a complete whirlwind and I still feel like I'm trying to get my feet on the ground here.

It has been tons of fun living near so much family and means I'm constantly busy.

I haven't had much time to sit around here which is good!

I've been planning multiple parties since I've been here and it has been really fun!

I'm missing my friends and the life we built in Utah, but I'm remembering why I love it here too.

I have days where I ache to go back, but other days are really great here.

The girls also keep me very busy and are still causing a lack of sleep and an abundance of grey hairs but what's new? Ha!

I'm also really loving shopping at Pink Blush! They have tons of cute maternity clothes and stylish women's clothes. I love wearing this baseball tee out and about because it is so comfy and cute! I was having a hard time finding this exact top online, but there are plenty of trendy maternity clothes options on their site! I'm not currently pregnant, but I am able to find something for every season of life!

Oaklyn:

My Oaks is three! She is the most stubborn child but also the cutest.

She just gets prettier by the day. Sassier too ;)

We keep talking about her "happy birthday" and she can hardly wait!

I love when she gets so excited about things.

She has been loving being surrounded by so much family.

I honestly think she has forgotten about Utah completely because of how much fun she has with family here.

She always has someone to play with and is in heaven having grandparents within 5 minutes of each other.

She seems so much older to me now and is SO smart!

Her vocabulary is incredible and she is always trying to use big words in sentences. 

I'm always impressed with her memory, ability to pick up new things, and eagerness to learn

Cambria:

Oh my sweet baby Cam!

I'm still as obsessed with her as ever!

I literally cannot get enough of this baby.

She's so squishy and perfect!

She is the most angelic child you will ever meet.

She get's a solid D+ for nighttime sleeping but it doesn't even bother me because I'm so obsessed with her and how adorable and sweet she is!

She takes great naps, but is still waking up quite a bit at night.

She is sitting completely by herself for long periods of time.

She rolls alllll over the place.

She's eating solid foods and figuring out how to eat on her own.

Everything about this child is adorable!

That about sums up what each of us are up to now!

I'll try harder to update more in the future!

Mostly, life just keeps passing by and we can't believe how quickly things are going.

We have a three year old and a 6 month old and it happened in a blink!

It seems like just yesterday I was Shopping at Pink Blush for their Pregnancy Clothes  and now here I am looking at their women's line!

Time is a crazy thing.

I hope all of you are well and I'm excited to share Oaklyn's party with you!!

All my love,

Aleigh Joy

0

Within the Walls of My Home

Photo credit to Kiely Ro Photography 

Part of me is saying it's not worth my time to write this post, but the other part of me is saying "hey wait, isn't this why you started a blog?" 

Sooo... here goes Nothin!

I'm not going to tell you who I voted for, because to be honest that shouldn't matter.

If you liked me before the whole voting scene went down, why should that change?

I won't define you by who you voted for, and I sure hope you won't, me. 

We all woke up this morning and went about our lives per usual, correct?

Maybe a few were celebrating, a few were crying, and a few were upset, sure... but we all lived the same Wednesday we always do.

Because that's the thing... this country will not change over night.

America has undergone some pretty rough things in the past, if you paid attention at all in school you'll agree with me there, and somehow we survived it all.

If you aren't a fan of the new president, that's fine, but please don't act out irrationally.

The United States of America is and should be just that... United.

With each other, with our neighbors, with our families, and our president.

I get it, you don't agree with everything he stands for... but will you ever agree with everything a president stands for?

Probably not.

I didn't agree with quite a few things our last president changed and believed in, but my life still went on and I chose to focus on the bigger, more eternal picture. 

If you're planning on moving tomorrow, so be it.

But as for me, I am entirely proud to be an American no matter who is in office.

Our country is not defined by our president, it is defined by our people.

So try, and try hard, to be a people of love, compassion, and empathy.

You may not agree with him, me, or her... but you can still choose to represent yourself in a respectful matter.

Alright, now that those thoughts are out... 

I want to ask you to think about what is most important to you.

Think real hard.

I hope more than anything, you are thinking about your family.

Whether that be your immediate family, extended family, or those that are "like family," those are the people we should truly be thinking about right now.

I encourage each of you that are reading this to stop scrolling through Facebook and posting your differing opinions on people's statuses and to think about what you can do to create a stronger family focused on Christ. 

Because that is what matters, and if you have faith in The Lord, you have faith in our country. 

So as for me, I'm not freaking out about this election.

I can't believe we ended up with those two candidates... but I knew I could live with either one of them in office because they make temporal decisions, not eternal. 

As for me, I'll be using these times of disagreement as a time to teach my children what really matters.

And, I'll be doing this within the walls of my own home; where only mine and my husband's opinions matter.

My goal is to make our home a sanctuary that my family looks forward to coming home to.

That will only happen if I teach them correct principles, not those of hate and judgement.

I'll teach them that racism is two sided and can be demolished if we have the pure love of Christ in our hearts.

I'll teach them to respect others even if they have a differing opinion.

I'll be teaching them that women are strong and important, but men are too. 

I'll be teaching them that love conquers all hate and to love as they wish to be loved.

I'll also be teaching them that the going will get rough, but it's how we handle ourselves in those moments that defines us.

I'll teach them that we will always respect our president because he/she is an imperfect person too, and everyone deserves a chance.

I'll teach them to pray, in all things and through all things.

Last but absolutely not least, I'll always emphasize that the world we're living in currently is not forever. This world is in control of our Maker, and he has a plan for us that will make every trial and hardship worth it to experience pure and complete joy. 

So if today, yesterday, or tomorrow you're having a hard time, try a little harder to remember that all that really matters, is what happens within the walls of your own home.
If you really want to make a difference, raise the next generation of voters to have a little more love, understanding, compassion, honesty, and faith in their hearts.

All my love,
Aleigh Joy

2

Just a Little Update

I really love getting to work with companies and review their awesome products, but I have to admit... it's a lot of work!

Yes, it's fun... but taking pictures, writing a post, editing a post, submitting links, etc takes up a lot of the time I used to spend just updating this blog about personal thoughts.

I love that I get to help pay the bills with this blog of mine, but sometimes I forget why I even started!

The title, "For the Joy of Life" says it all.

I started this blog to share the joys in my life and as an attempt to remember them since writing in an actual journal is not my expertise.

Cut me some slack, I wrote Hunter through snail mail for two years ;)

I got to thinking about how I haven't done a family update in a while and if you've been a reader for a while you probably remember that I have zero method to my madness when it comes to writing updates sooooo here goes nothing!

We moved. Yep that didn't get an exclamation point...

I'm trying to be more optimistic about it because I'm really actually happy here,

but it's just hard to experience so much change at once.

We didn't move into our own house, even our own apartment...

We moved into Hunter's grandmother's basement apartment and while it's actually very nice,

it's just not home to me yet.

We'll only be here for a short time, but we didn't plan on being here at all in the first place.

But, life happens and you learn to be okay with it.

So that's currently what I'm doing, learning to be okay with it. All of it.

Some pros are: 

-We now have a backyard

-We can finally fit a kitchen table

-Two full bathrooms

-There's a piano down here, so I should probably learn

-Bigger rooms

-Bigger space in general

-Much more natural light

So there, I'll focus on the good :)

We bought a new (to us) car!

The car we were driving happened to be owned by my father in law and was actually meant for my sister in law.

We were using it while Hunter was in college so we could save up.

Then the unexpected happened and a whole lot of changes were made.

We are so grateful we saved our tax refund for a rainy day because that helped us with the down payment.

We are also thankful for Hyundai for finding us a car with very reasonable payments.

So we're adulting, and it's scary, but it also feels good.

I think I weirdly actually fell more in love with Hunter when he signed the papers for the car.

I was just so proud of him, and us, and all we've done together.

Also, I really like this car 

I got a new calling in our ward!

If you aren't LDS here's a little break down.

Our church is the same world wide. Like completely the same.

We all go to church for three hours, have the same lesson topics, have the same structure, heck most of the buildings even look the same!

The only difference is the people in each leadership position in each "ward"

There's the church as a whole. Then there's stakes which is made up of a bunch of wards. Then there's wards based off which building is closest to you.

And that's how you know which building to go to and what time.

So in my ward I just got called to be a relief society teacher.

So I get to teach the women in my ward and I am SO excited about it :)

Hunter is still working for BYU football.

He's liking the new staff and will always just love being surrounded by football.

He's planning on keeping this job til he graduates if all goes according to plan.

He also is now working for Culinary Crafts, a catering company in Utah.

He usually only works on Saturdays due to his other job and school schedule so we don't see much of him but he's definitely paying the bills.

As I had mentioned on instagram, he got into the business school at BYU!

This is a really hard school to get in to and I'm just so proud of him.

He's loving his classes and as far as I know, he's doing well in them.

Him getting in, was a huge answer to our prayers. It also gives me yet another reason to be proud of him!

He's in young men's in our church and is the perfect guy for it.

He relates so well with them and has so much fun with his calling.

He loves his little Oaks and I'm loving watching them play together now that she's older.

My favorite noise ever is hearing Oaklyn giggle and scream as dada chases her around the house.

If it were up to Hunter, I'd already be pregnant with another ;)

As for me... I'm just getting by haha.

Okay just kidding, I'm loving all I'm doing but I'm just so busy!

While Hunter is gone all day I try to hold down the fort.

This generally entails trying to wake up before Oaklyn so I can do my makeup in peace, changing a whole lot of diapers, cleaning up a ton of messes, washing lots of sticky fingers, witnessing countless tantrums, getting several wet baby kisses, giving snuggles and hugs constantly, always laughing at how silly and sassy my child can be, kissing numerous boo boo's, and filling up sippy cups and bottles galore. 

We try to get outside at least once a day and every day is a new place but Oaks just loves to go "Buh Bye" with mama.

Surprisingly, we experience far less tantrums if we're out and about.

When we get home I put Oaklyn down for a nap and spend that whole time answering emails, editing photos, and writing posts. 

That's usually my favorite time of the day because it's me time and I feel important.

I know motherhood is important, but I love that I get to do something for myself.

I'm really enjoying all the opportunities blogging is bringing my way, I'm still doing photography and would love to schedule shoots, and I have another business in the works ;)

Oaklyn Joy is just growing right up

I stopped doing the monthly updates after a year but if I would've kept going, each post would be packed!

This kid is learning something new every single day and she amazes me constantly.

Not to mention, she's the cutest little thing I have ever seen!

She is seriously getting prettier by the day and just keeps looking more and more grown up.

She's so much more of a "kid" than a "baby" now and it's kind of breaking my heart while also so exciting!

He favorite foods right now are "poppy" (popcorn), "sauce" (any form of dip but preferably mustard), "wa wa" (any drink in her cup), and of course cookies. She also seems to like chicken nuggets, pizza, rice, carrots, and still loves shredded cheese.

She finally likes TV and gets so excited over Clifford and Care Bears or anything else with animals.

Her best friend is her white teddy bear that she named "Gida."

She only sees him at bed time and naps and gets so excited! She burrows her little face into him and her face lights up.

She definitely has gotten the hang of sleeping in comparison to her first year and it makes me so happy!

She walks super good and is pro at jumping. 

Her favorite toy is shoes ;)

Seriously, she could try on shoes for hours on hours!

She's saying so many words and is starting to put two together.

She's also super opinionated now and chooses her outfit almost every day. Bow and all!

She's just the best and so much fun!

This time in our lives is nothing short of crazy.

However, it's also super fun.

We love being young and married while also being parents.

We're both always tired and Oaklyn is always crazy ;)

But seriously, we're just having fun and living each day as best we can.

I've had a lot of people ask "how we've been doing" you know... as far as Hunter's dad goes.

The truth of the matter is, it's hard.

We both still have break downs and not a day goes by that we aren't thinking about it.

We're absolutely still grieving and we're going to take our time.

I've dealt with lots of anxiety and Hunter has dealt with the pain of losing one of his very best friends.

We wish we could call him, give him a hug, see him, just say one more word to him... but we're just trying to remember this is not the end.

We miss him. 

We're sad.

We love him.

But, we really will be okay.

It's still so fresh and we will take our time with healing, if it ever comes.

That being said, thank you to everyone for all your love and support.

We feel overwhelmed with all the amazing people in our lives.

Anddd that about sums it up!

We had an amazing summer turned most horrible summer but we're really looking forward to fall. 

This holiday season will be hard but we have the greatest family ever. (I'm biased but whatever)

We have so many happy things going on in our lives and we are trying to focus on them.

We have been given much and we are so thankful for this life we live. 

All my love,

Aleigh Joy

We got to attend a taping for a Christmas concert... in September!

Oaklyn goes to the BYU home opener!

This was just today... she got a pretty bad bonk on her forehead and this photo does not do it justice! Welcome to crazy toddlerhood.

Utah is gorgeous and we love hiking!

Oaksie watching "Gidas" (care bears) and eating poppy! She's such a mess by the end of the night haha!

But seriously, how cute is she?? Look at those long legs! Right after church.

There she is! The new(ish) car

This was the Sunday after Pat's funeral. It was a hard week but we were smiling through the pain.

This isn't new by any means but Hunter wouldn't leave San Diego without it. It's his favorite picture of him and his dad after a high school football game. Hunter's dad was his absolute biggest fan. 

This picture kills me a little inside. We went to visit his dad the day after the funeral. Oaklyn and I walked away for a minute to let Hunter be alone and I couldn't help but take this sweet and heart wrenching photo. Never ever would I have expected I would have this picture of Hunter this young. It still isn't making sense, but we're so thankful families are forever. 

0

When Nothing Else Makes Sense

I haven't quite been able to pinpoint my recent thoughts and feelings and adequately put them into words, but I feel like it's time to at least get something out. So, here's a little bit about how our family's world was recently rocked...
 It was a Saturday morning and I was fast asleep after being up all night. Hunter was on a camping trip and all sorts of anxiety kicks in keeping me awake when he isn't home. I can't recall what I was dreaming about when my sister in law came frantically running through my door, but what she had said made me think I was still dreaming... no wait, I thought I was having a nightmare. It was 9:55am on July 30th when I felt her tear hit my arm as we held each other close and I realized it was in fact a reality. A really horrible, devastating, unfair, unexpected, and surreal reality.  "I guess he was running and then just collapsed" I heard her say. "Right as I was headed out the door for brunch I read the text saying that dad died." We were sobbing in each other's arms and before we could even process the news we had just heard, our phones began to ring. It was other family members all as hysterical as we were. There was one common goal, get to San Diego as fast as possible. We were bawling and packing and praying and wondering how any of this could even be real. We managed to have the car packed and ready to go around 11:30 and thinking about meeting up with my sweet heartbroken husband devastated me. He had been at a campout with the young men in our church and getting the news to him, was quite difficult. I strongly remember silently praying the shortest and most sincere prayer I have ever uttered that I would somehow be able to comfort my sister in law and my husband during our unplanned car ride back home, amidst the gut wrenching feeling even I had. That 10 hour trip was something I'll never forget even though I was slapping my face to try to even stay awake. At times we were laughing about memories we had made with him and the next moment I could hear sniffles and saw tears streaming down cheeks. My own eyes were constantly welling with tears and the road was blurry almost the whole way. We were anxious to be with family but also dreading all that we were about to go through. It absolutely didn't make sense, any of it, and the rest of that week was the biggest blur. There were flowers and cards filling the kitchen, friends stopping by to offer support and comfort, funeral plans were arranged, finances were discussed, and there were tear stained cheeks everywhere you turned. 

I can hands down say, that Pat passing away has been the absolute hardest trial of any of our lives... and I cannot stand to believe that it's only beginning. It's been a month as of last Saturday, yet that time has felt like a lifetime. Sometimes, it doesn't feel real. Then again, this is the most real pain I have ever felt. I've gone through a variety of emotions these past few weeks and I'm sure the rest of the Moore family has as well. I've felt sad beyond comparison, then I'll remember a happy memory and smile through the heartache. I'll be listening to a song that brings me joy which quickly turns to tears. I've felt encouragement that we can do this incredibly hard thing, and then a blanket of fear takes over my mind. I've luckily felt a glimpse of peace knowing that our Father in Heaven has a wonderful plan and yet the next moment, I'll feel anger that we were robbed of what could have been.

It may seem odd to some people that I'm so upset over my father in law passing, especially because of all the jokes that in laws are hard, but I won the lottery in this department and loved him like a second father. So, to give you some background, here's a glimpse of the kind of man Pat was. He was humble and teachable yet always seemed to know the answer. He was kind and loving, yet tough when he needed to be. He was athletic and ate well, yet knew life was short so he enjoyed a treat or two. He got excited over his new "toys" but never bragged or let his "things" be the center of his life. His prized possessions were his family, faith, and country and he could talk your ear off about all three if you let him. He made the world's best cookies and really enjoyed a movie night if we were watching Sweet Home Alabama, A Cinderella Story, or Galaxy Quest. He has an incredible testimony of the restored gospel and served in his church callings diligently. He managed to care about and help everyone that came into his life in some shape or form. He also made sure all of his good deeds went unnoticed as he never sought praise. Pat accomplished more before 9am everyday than anyone I've ever known, and finished all the Lord needed of him on this earth in only 57 years.

It's safe to say that none of this makes sense to me. Not any part of it. I've gone through several scenarios in my head just trying to understand how this could happen to us, or better yet, why this happened to us. You know that line in the song "If I Die Young" that goes, "funny when you're dead how people start listening?" I think that was written for Pat. His teachings, even though he isn't physically here on earth, are still being taught. I know that his legacy will live on and his short life with bless others, but it just doesn't seem fair to us. I know the Lord needs him but it's hard not to feel like we need him more. As I was thinking about my sweet mother in law and recognizing her strength through this incredibly difficult trial, I realized the only thing keeping her going, is her testimony. The same goes for the rest of the family. Without it, I'm positive this would be a million times harder. Even though nothing else seems to make sense to me, at least my testimony of Heavenly Father's plan  does. I know we will see Pat again. In fact, I'm positive he's preparing to show us all around and can't wait for us to be there with him. The veil between our earthly home and our heavenly home has been incredibly thin these past few weeks as I've pondered the concept of life and death.

 I know what the plan is for all of us and I truly believe in it, but I'll admit I have wondered how "The Plan of Happiness" could be anything but happy for us right now. It's taken a month of deep thought and prayer to come to understand that His plan is so much more than what happens on this earth and what we can comprehend. True and complete happiness, the kind where families can be together forever, where children don't ever go hungry, where slavery doesn't exist, where goodbyes aren’t necessary, where bodies don’t age, get injured, bleed, or die, and where "bad news" is never said, can only exist in a greater place. This is the happiness we’re being shaped for while being tested and tried on this earth. It’s the happiness that will be ours, without end, once we make it through our time on a fallen world that promises opposition daily. It’s the joy that will be our rest once we work hard and have done all we were meant to do in mortality. His plan of happiness, is happiness, and that will bring hope and faith to our hearts during this life when nothing else seems to make sense. 

I've began to think a little deeper about the blessings we all crave. You know, to pay the bills without worry each month, to take away the physical and emotional pain our loved ones experience, to see those struggling with infertility finally have children, and to be reunited with the loved ones taken from us too soon... These blessings that seem to never come make so many of us wonder, “How is this really in a plan of happiness?” And that’s when we need to be reminded that if we lived a life free of opposition and trouble, we truly would never know the complete joy waiting for us, and we’d never have a need for Him. After all, happiness isn’t a lack of misery, it’s knowing the feeling of misery and then living eternally in a place where that is overcome.

Every so often, we are blessed with a little reminder of a broader, more eternal plan. A plan that we can't quite understand because the concept of eternity is not one our minds can quite grasp in our mortal state. But, there’s a beauty in knowing that our eternal value is far greater than any feeling we'll ever experience during our time away from home and that a seat is being saved for us by our loved ones we dearly miss. 

It's hard, honestly, to not feel discouraged when hardship falls upon us. It's scary to think of the rest of our lives without a spouse, parent, child, sibling, friend, or grandparent. I'm sure several of you are nodding your head because you have been through the same sorrow, though a different gravestone. It's easy to question and wonder how this could really be a perfect plan when it feels far from it while going through the trials we once agreed to enduring. But, let us always remember that the Lord has felt every pain we will ever feel and wants us to need Him. He agreed to the plan just as we did, and though it's everything but easy currently, it will lead to pure and eternal joy.

“Frustrations are only temporary... The Lord has promised that in the eternities no blessing will be denied his sons and daughters who keep the commandments, are true to their covenants, and desire what is right.” -Dallin H Oaks

Pat, we'll miss you every day until His great plan is fulfilled. Thank you for uplifting us, teaching us, helping us, and guiding us. Thank you for being the perfect role model for my husband. I can't wait to teach my kids all about you and I must admit, I'm a little jealous you get to meet them before me ;) "Our ultimate goal is to live together forever in the presence of The Lord, Forever Moore."

If you'd like to see the beautiful memorial video made for Pat by my sister in law Michelle, click here.

And lastly, thank you to everyone who has supported our family in the form of words, prayers, meals, cards, hugs, texts, phone calls, monetary donations, and just being there... We appreciate it far more than we'll ever be able to say. 

All my love,

Aleigh Joy

0

A Little Kindness Never Hurt Nobody

I've been thinking quite a bit about this topic lately and it just so happens that I made a guest appearance on Steffanie's (from The Urban Hare) mocktail periscope series and the topic was on being kind.

This topic has been on quite a few mother's (or parents in general) minds lately based off the current tragedies that have made the news.

(If you are unaware please refer to the articles here and here)

It is interesting, and quite frankly, annoying, that the parents of these children have become the subject of ridicule online as they mourn the loss of their child.

No parent wants to outlive their child. Ever.

The thought alone makes my heart ache.

So what's interesting to me, is that others can't seem to offer their condolences to these families but instead feel the need to tell them that the death of their child was their own fault.

Seeing the cruel remarks of those hiding behind a computer screen makes me sick, and it needs to stop. Now. 

These words are harsh and unfair, and truly will do nothing beneficial in the end. 

You see, It’s easy to throw other parents under the bus when something horrific happens because we want to believe that we are somehow better. 

It's easy for parents to believe that their "superior parenting" can prevent a tragedy and that bad things can only happen to an "irresponsible parent."

Want to know the truth?

Bad things happen to good parents, good families, good people... and when those bad things strike they deserve our empathy, and never our judgement.

I want to share a quick story with you:

Somewhere around 10 months ago, when Oaklyn wasn't quite mobile, I was able to set her on top of my bed without worry.

In the mornings, she would lay next to me as I would relieve myself from the night and pump to supply food for her. 

She would smile and grab her toys as we laid there together.

One morning I got bored while pumping and turned my head for a split second to grab my phone. 

When I looked back she was already off the bed, in mid air, about to fall on the floor.

Her little body hit and she instantly began to scream.

I jumped off the bed and frantically grabbed her.

We spent the rest of the morning rocking on the rocking chair as I probably whispered "I'm sorry" 100 times in her little ear.

The reason I share this story with you, is because it is an example, though far less tragic, that resembles what is currently happening.

I'm sure it would be easy for a lot of you to say that I should have just kept my eyes on her and that wouldn't have happened. 

I'm also sure that some may say I shouldn't be so glued to my phone and that my daughter wouldn't have fallen.

But what I'll tell you, is that it was an accident.

It was an accident I wish would've never happened, but it did and accidents happen often.

Especially when you are a parent balancing a million things every single day.

There is no such thing as a perfect earthly parent.

So to all of you other imperfect parents out there, I beg you, to stop shaming and blaming all other mothers and fathers that are just trying to do their best daily. 

My heart breaks for all of the families that lose their children to bizarre and horrific accidents daily.

We all often point fingers, but try instead, to take the high road and show kindness to those in need.

Instead of criticizing and ridiculing, try uplifting and rallying around others.

It's much easier to smile than frown, and it is much easier to share a good thought than to deny it. 

Try your hardest to be soft and kind instead of letting the world make you bitter and hard. 

If the words you wrote on social media appeared on your skin, would others still think you are beautiful?

We all say that we want to teach our children to be kind and uplifting, well the best way to do so, is to practice what you preach. 

So I encourage all of you to back up other parents instead of tearing them down.

Parenting is hard enough, we don't need bystanders making it harder. 

And always remember, a little kindness never hurt nobody.

All my love,

Aleigh Joy 

5

The Moores in Real Life: Why Me?

My Monday last week was comedic.

Like, something straight out of a movie that you can't stop laughing at because man, that character has some bad luck!

Only this time I was the character, and I was not laughing.

Most of my posts I try ot keep on the happier side but guys, there was nothing happy about this! 

Ha, enjoy my ridiculous Monday ;)

I had possibly the hardest time falling asleep the night before.

 I think I may have fallen asleep sometime around 2:30am after plotting ways to terrorize our insane upstairs neighbor that can't seem to get a clue that we can hear her every move. 

Even at 2am.

After getting SO close to standing on our bed and banging on the ceiling to let her know that I was at this point, furious, there was finally silence.

Ahhh sweet silence.

Around 5am Oaklyn started screaming.

Of course.

I fed her, unwillingly, but I fed her.

I crawled back in bed and fell asleep so fast only to be woken up by our neighbor. Again. At 6:30 am.

LADY! YOU GOT 4 HOURS OF SLEEP!

What on earth are you doing?

She continued to stomp around for about an hour.

I fall back asleep.

I hear Oaklyn screaming.

Look at phone, it's 8am.

Here we go, happy Monday!

I bring Oaklyn in bed with me in hopes that maybe, just maybe she'll actually snuggle.

HA! Just the opposite. She starts scratching my face, crawling all over me, trying to fly off the bed, etc...

Okay fine let's go eat breakfast.

Oaklyn grabs her bowl of oatmeal while I had walked over to the fridge and dumps the whole bowl on herself. Perfect.

I grab my baby caked in Oatmeal and grab a bottle from the fridge. I close the door and it snags my big toe.

It hurt SO bad I fell to the floor crying, with Oaklyn in my arms.

I look down and there was already a pool of blood on the floor.

Oaklyn is now crying and smells like poop.

I go change her and get ready to put her down for a nap with a bloody toe that is killing me.

I put her in her crib after she had practically rubbed her eyes off.

"Oh good, she must be exhausted!"

I walk out the door. Cue screams.

She finally falls asleep and I just lay on my bed.

"It's only 11am. Is the day over yet?"

I get ready for the day and try to fit in some blogging work.

Oaklyn wakes up at 11:45...

"You have got to be kidding me!"

She wouldn't stop crying so I go in to see if she's still hungry only to hear stomping from above.

Of course, our neighbor woke her up.

She wouldn't go back down so I gave up and take her to the kitchen.

She was fussing over EVERYTHING and I just wanted to curl up and sleep.

I set Oaklyn near some toys and text my mom, "Sometimes I really wish we lived closer to you."

She of course let me know she would've taken Oaks in a heartbeat and I just wanted to buy a plane ticket right then and there.

The rest of the day was filled with me tripping over the stroller in the grocery store parking lot, a whole lot of crying from Oaklyn, a swollen toe, a bloody nose for Oaklyn, a big stain of baby food on my white shirt, and a HUGE sigh of relief when Hunter came home.

Days like last Monday make me want to wish these young married, young parenting, condo living days away.

Thank goodness the rest of the week was much better and I was able to remember that this life I'm living is in fact much more joyful than that one Monday was.

Some days are the worst, some days aren't anything to remember, but most days I really do feel so blessed to be alive.

So even though this post was not my happiest, let's all get a laugh out of my "real life" Monday.

All my love,

Aleigh Joy

0

The Moores in Real Life: A diaper explosion

I saw a quote somewhere the other day about social media and how it can really make others feel down on themselves. 

It is so true that you only really see the good parts in everyone's day on social media.

It's the worst when your day isn't exactly going as planned and then you see your favorite stars or even friends with the best pictures having the most fun.

But what we missed was what led up to that picture.

They could've had to fight their kids to even take the picture, they may have gotten to church 20 minutes late because who knows what happened, the kitchen could be a complete mess but all you see is the corner of clean house in the picture, etc...

I'm guilty of this.

Very guilty actually.

Sometimes I'll post a picture and laugh to myself like "oh if only everyone knew that Oaklyn would not stop screaming right before this was taken." But my caption says something along the lines of "beautiful day with my darling baby!" and no one will ever know...

So, I decided to start a new series on this blog. 

It may not occur every week and it might be on different days, but I will be sharing the "real" of our lives amidst the fashion posts, reviews, recipes, and other posts that were pretty darn staged ;)

My first "real life" post is going to be on our Tuesday night this week. 

Ha, I'm already laughing to myself just thinking back to it.

Hunter had an intramural basketball game that Oaklyn and I went to go watch.

We were late, like really late, because Oaklyn was refusing a nap that I thought she really needed to take.

I finally gave up and left only to make it for like 10 minutes of Hunter playing.

Oh well, at least I got out of the house.

Since I knew I would be going later than Hunter, we took two separate cars. 

Hunter put Oaklyn in her car seat. She was already crying.

He said goodbye to us and we were on our way.

Now Oaklyn is screaming.

We get home and I stick Oaks in her bumbo to give her some dinner while also making cookies and cleaning up from our dinner.

She seemed happy as could be and I was able to get everything done I needed to. 

All of a sudden Hunter looks at me, "EW! did you toot? It stinks!"

I let him know I didn't ha and said "maybe it was Oaklyn."

Oaklyn is currently on day 11 of explosive diarrhea.

Talk about gross. I think you can see where this story is going...

The smell left for the most part and we continued on.

Oaklyn started to get fussy and was trying to get out of the bumbo.

"Hold on baby, I'm almost done with the dishes."

I was thinking she was just really tired because she didn't take an afternoon nap.

I finished the dishes and picked Oaks up. It took me two seconds to see that she was in fact the reason there was a terrible smell.

She pooped.

Like, all over.

It was up her back, down her legs, up her stomach, and pouring out of every inch of the diaper.
She was wearing SUCH a cute outfit and being the mom that I am my first thought may or may not have been "great another ruined outfit."
We've gone through several this week...

No wonder she was trying to get out of the bumbo...

I took her pants off and suddenly felt dizzy.

"Hunter, you need to take her, I think I'm going to throw up."

It really was that bad.

He grabbed her and started making gagging noises when he saw her diaper and everything leaking out of it.

We made a plan.

We would take off the diaper, put it in a plastic bag, and quickly transfer her to the running water in the kitchen sink so that the water could clean her for us.

Hunter took her shirt off and was holding her under her arms as she stood on the counter.

I undid the diaper straps and the diaper dropped in the grocery bag.

I really almost threw up at this point.

It was SO bad!

So, picture Hunter and I making gagging noises looking at each other with terrified faces all while Oaklyn just stands there on the counter like "What guys? You do it too..."

Hunter immediately put her in the running water in the sink and turned his head so he couldn't see the poop going down the drain.

Sick.

He looked back at her and noticed some of it wasn't coming off.

He was still holding Oaklyn under her arms and she was still just staring at us so confused.

I took the sprayer and sprayed the rest off all while making gagging noises still because EW this was a BAD diaper!

Oaklyn started giggling at the feeling of the sprayed water on her naked skin and it definitely lightened the mood.
Hunter and I looked at each other and laughed a little amidst the chaos of a veryy poopy baby.

Once it all appeared to be off her skin we plugged the drain and let her splash around in the sink happy as a clam.

I took the diaper outside to get rid of it forever, pinching my nose so I wouldn't smell the terrible stench.

After it was all said and done, Hunter and I just looked at each other laughing and said "oh the joys of parenthood."

We then gave each other a high five because it may have taken two of us to get her all clean but we got it done and didn't get any on us ha!

Our little baby was just splashing away in the sink and we stood there in the kitchen laughing and playing with her.

I couldn't help but think to myself, "This. This is my real life. And, it is so hilariously, imperfectly perfect."

Now excuse me while I go figure out why Oaklyn is yet again fighting a nap...

All my love,

Aleigh Joy

1

This Body is Amazing

(photo by Erryn Kowallis Photography)

It was the day after I had Oaklyn...

I was standing in our hospital room's bathroom about to tie my gown back up after nursing my new little baby.

She was snoozing away in her daddy's arms.

She was content, he was smitten, and I was sore/exhausted.

Right before grabbing the tie I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror.

My eyes widened and my already cloudy mind panicked.

"Why do I still look pregnant? She's out of there. What is still in there?"

The nurse came in a few hours later.

"I'm here to check your swelling."

"Okay good, my ankles seem really puffy and my fingers are extra swollen."

The nurse touched my ankles and looked up at me "Yeah you are still really swollen. I'll be back to check on you tomorrow before you leave."

"Oh, that's it" I thought, "I'm just swollen, it will all go back to normal soon enough."

The next day I was getting dressed to go home.
I brought a sweatshirt and leggings.
Very, very, tight, pre-pregnancy leggings.
There was no way I was going home in those. Especially with that diaper I had to wear.
Thank goodness I had the stretchy pants I wore to the hospital.
The next few days I spent much time weeding through my closet trying to find clothes that weren't too small or too big because I wasn't the size before pregnancy or during pregnancy.

Thanks to nursing, constantly being on the move with a baby that loved being rocked, and a fussy newborn that didn't like when I left her to go eat... I started to shrink rather quickly.

I was back in most of my pre pregnancy clothes with the exception of some pairs of jeans, in a few weeks.

But the loose skin, the stretch marks I didn't know existed, and the lost muscle definition haunted me every time I saw my reflection.

I know every new mother thinks it. Of course, some more often than others...

"I miss my body before kids."

I was more limber, I was stronger, my skin was tighter, you could see my abs poking through, and I felt comfortable in my own skin.

What happened?

I'll tell you what happened...

Something amazing happened.

I grew a child in my own body for 9 months and 5 days.

I stretched and often ached but I did that.

My body did that.

I gave birth to a child.

I'll spare you the details, but that's no walk in the park.

I gave Oaklyn life.

My body gave Oaklyn life.

I have fed her for almost 7 months.

I have nourished and helped her grow.

My body has supplied her with food, it knew how to give her food.

I have rocked her and held her til my arms feel weak but she has been comforted during the fussiest times by being held close next to me.

My body pushed through the longest nights to help calm a little baby that was hurting, hungry, and had her days and nights mixed up.

When my mind told me I couldn't, my body kept going.

My body has recovered from the most amazing miracle and excruciating pain any human will know, because it is amazing.

It's hard to see the changes made and it's hard to work towards what I want to become.

I'm aloud to have a few thoughts, on occasion, of disappointment.

I wouldn't be human if I didn't.

But, it is also so important to remember that this body has been through much sacrifice to bring forth the miracle of life.

And that is the most important thing this body will do.

I will still continue to search youtube to find that miracle workout to get rid of that darn pooch... but I will also strive to remember, and I hope that you mothers will too, that these bodies of ours sure have done some incredible things.
Give yourself a little more credit because, your body is amazing.

All my love,

Aleigh Joy

0

I'm Near, You're Far.

"I hear them say that what we have may fade away, but I refuse. We'll never lose."

With 150 days left I have completely lost my marbles... 

but I have also fallen in love harder than I thought possible.

How on earth is it possible to love someone this much when you can only hear their voice twice a year and communicate through letters and emails?

It's beyond me, but I'm guilty as charged.

This whole journey is crazy, and long, but mostly crazy.

I don't know how we make it work, but we do. 

So, to those of you that think I'm absolutely crazy 1) I forgive you because 2) you're right. I am. But I wouldn't have it any other way. 

I realized that there really isn't a word, or even a sentence to explain what it is like to be away from your love for 2 entire years.

It's a roller coaster of emotions and even though I couldn't be any happier that he is out doing the Lord's work, it is still hard.

I figured I would try to make a video to somewhat explain what this is all about and what better time to post it than when we hit 150 days remaining?

It's completely cheesy and I try not to laugh at myself every time I watch it, but it is also my life right now.

I remember those snobby little high school girls that would whisper about how Hunter and I would never be able to make this work. 

Well, I only have 150 days left and despite the fact that my heart aches every. single. day. I have never been more in love and I plan to only grow deeper in love with him for the rest of my life. 

We're only just beginning.

                                                                                         a day in the life from Aleigh Mellinger on Vimeo.

All my love,

Aleigh Joy

0