The First Month

Tuesday, April 14, 2015
Being that Oaklyn's two month birthday is coming quite quickly, I think it's about time to finish up this post and publish it...
(side note: this was mostly written when she actually turned a month old so just jump back in time...)

So... I've kept a baby alive for one whole month!
3 weeks ago, I truly didn't think I was going to survive ha.
But, I did. 
And I can say now that those first few weeks really are worth it.
Oaklyn slept from 10:45pm-5am last night without waking up. she then fell back asleep around 6 and slept til 8:45. 
I feel like a new woman today!
So here I am, not napping while she does but catching up on her first month of life.

On Tuesday February 24th we were released from the hospital.
I took my sweet time getting ready to leave because I was beyond nervous to take her home with us. 
I knew my mom was coming that night, but babies don't come with an instruction manual and I suddenly felt like I had no idea what I was doing.
Nursing was still super difficult and frustrating, she screamed every time we changed her diaper, and I was so sleep deprived I almost fell asleep every time I blinked.
We had everything packed, Oaklyn was in her going home outfit I had picked out forever ago, and we took our first family picture.
We put her in the car seat, said goodbye to the nurse, and the next thing I knew we were a family of three driving home for the first time.
We opened the front door and stuck her car seat on the counter and just looked at her...
"What do we do now?"
She was still sleeping when we took her out of the car seat so we stuck her in the crib and Hunter took a shower singing every sappy father daughter song he could think of.
Suddenly, I burst into tears. And I couldn't quite figure out why, but the only reason I could think of was that things were now different, much different and I don't do very well with change. 
I was tired and overwhelmed and I missed having my husband all to myself. 
Then Oaklyn started crying and it hit me, hard. 
Nothing would ever be the same. 
I had quite a few more emotional breakdowns that first week, my hormones were crazy!
Thank goodness my mom was there to take her from me when I needed a break, cook dinner, and help me still see daylight ha.
After baby hormones are insane.
The next week got a little easier. 
This time Hunter's parents were there and Oaklyn was getting a little more used to life. 
We did a whole lot of nothing but watch her sleep, which was exactly what I needed. 
When it came time for hunt's parents to leave the breakdowns started happening again. 
I had no idea what I was doing, and I was still SO tired. 
Oaklyn's little face warmed my heart but I have never had to rely so much on The Lord. 
I must have prayed every 10 minutes of every day for patience and strength to be able to give this baby the love and care she needs. 
Her constant need to be held made it impossible to get anything done.
I have never been more grateful for Hunter than I am now.
He has helped SO much. 
There were days that Oaklyn would be crying and I had no idea why but it was so heartbreaking to see her little face turn red and her eyes well with tears so I would just cry with her until she fell asleep in my arms. 
Around the fourth week of her life she began to have more regular sleep patterns and decided daytime naps are necessary.
Thank goodness.
I was able to get a few peaceful showers in and even ventured out of the house alone a few times.
Thankfully her umbilical cord finally came off and we were able to give her, her first real bath which she completely loved!
She began smiling SO much and developed an obsession with ceiling fans.
She started to become WAY more active and incredibly strong, even though she's not the biggest fan of tummy time.
She's a motion girl. She sleeps pretty good at night as long as she's swaddled up nice and tight, but during the day she HAS to be bounced, rocked, in the swing, in the stroller, wrapped on me as I'm walking, or moving in the car.
Nursing... oh nursing.
I was so adamant about doing everything in my power to nurse my baby. Well, she had other plans. So after several tries and failed attempts, I pump and bottle feed her breast milk because that is the only way she actually gets fed. I hate pumping, but I'm so glad I have the option.
It's crazy how much your life changes when you have a baby.
You can be so sleep deprived and your back can hurt so bad from rocking a baby all day, and yet their tiny everything's make you wish  you could go back to the first time you held them and do it all over.
I'm able to be home with Oaklyn all day every day and experience every new sound and facial expression she makes.
I'm there for every milestone and meltdown.
It can easily get pretty lonely, but I'm so glad I'm able to be her mother and watch her grow daily.
Hunter couldn't be any more proud or happy to be a father.
I love watching him with our daughter and I'm SO thankful for all of his help!
We may be a bit biased but we truly believe she is the prettiest little girl alive.
Hunter may be in for it during her teen years ;)
He hair grows longer daily and her eyes are getting bluer as well!
Her little features are adorable, and I'm so excited to watch her grow :)

I rambled quite a bit in this post.
But my mind is anything but organized these days.
So, here's to her one month post in efforts to remembering it all :)

All my love,
Aleigh Joy

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